This article was written by Tania Bhattacharya on behalf of Sherley Altidor.
Edited by Lynn Joseph
Most of us love the concept of being in love. We idealize being with that special someone who will make our life so much better and beautiful than ever before. However, it is not always that we find Mr. or Ms. Right. Sometimes, it simply takes awhile to find The One. Sometimes, we end up with a few people that we think are The One and as it turns out, they most definitely are not The One.
I’m here to tell you that this is completely okay for any of the above to happen. It’s okay to be single. I fear we don’t hear this enough but this is in fact, true. I’m here to tell you to embrace the love within you while you are single and that self-love will attract who it needs to attract when that romantic love is ready to rest itself inside of your heart.
Being single can be one of the best things in the world if you know how to enjoy it. Only you have the power to say yes and enjoy the beauty that the world has to offer. Often there is a lot of pressure on us from friends or family to be with someone. There is a standard that society has set for us to be financially secure and physically safe with someone else. Yes, the dream is to be able to be in love with someone that we can live out the rest of our days with but logistically speaking, there are definitely smart reasons to want to have someone by your side, especially as you age. That said, being with anyone just for the sake of safety can do more harm than good if you’re not mentally in a space to offer up so much of yourself to someone else for the long term. I say, embrace your singlehood. Do not be fooled into romanticizing a life that would be miserable for you or a life that you are not yet ready to walk into and step into with humility.
Do you know what the best thing about being single is? You have all the time in the world for yourself. Single people make sacrifices in their lives too, just not the same sacrifices that couples do. Single people face challenges as well but that should not be the main reason to want someone by your side. You can go through the storm with loved ones that do not have to be romantic partners. You can celebrate your greatest life moments with loved ones that do not have to be romantic partners.
According to a Gallup study published in December 2015, 48% of Americans say they do not have enough time to do what they want. For working professionals, time constraints seem to be even higher. Six out of ten working people (that’s 61%) say they are pressed for time. Balancing the professional and personal fronts is a difficult job. However, things might be a bit easier to handle when you are single and when you can focus most or all of your free time on yourself. Single people still may have to devote their time to other responsibilities such as caregiving, for example.
Depending on what your responsibilities are at the moment, you have time to love yourself and treat yourself in ways so many other people dream they can do without running how they spend their time past another person. Pursue a hobby. Join a gym. Go hiking. Get to know your body more and discover how you can pleasure yourself more without someone else present. Go out as often as your heart desires. Travel wherever you want, however you want, with an itinerary or not). Always be sure to travel safe though do your research and take precautionary measures if you are traveling the world alone. Consider joining a singles group that is traveling to a place in the world that you want to travel to. Whatever it is that you want to set your mind to and you know that you are capable of doing that thing while single, don’t wait. Do not wait for anybody to live your life to the fullest.
A study conducted by sociologist Erin Cornwell found that people who were single were more likely to socialize with their friends. Now, when you are single is the best time to stay engaged with your friends. Because when you do meet Mr. or Ms. Right in the most unexpected way, you will have so much joy to share with that special someone. You will have those friends that you can invite to a barbecue and they won’t have to worry about hiring a babysitter for their kids because you’d already established a kinship and understanding that everyone is welcome.
So what’s the bottom line? Being in a relationship is great but being single is amazing as well. In fact, it is as awesome as you make it to be. This sentiment is also true for relationships, only when you’re single, you only have yourself to depend on to make your days great. So what do you say? What kind of days are you trying to make the most of? All of them? Or just the ones when someone is beside you? Let the person who may eventually stand beside you have full confidence in knowing that you are capable of being your best and living your best life no matter the circumstance.
You control your destiny and knowing that gives you the power to make being single fun or not so fun. So if you’ve learned one thing today, I hope it’s that rushing into a relationship is not going to do you any favors. Wait for love to happen in time and in the meantime, love yourself more than anyone else ever could. Enjoy your time alone because that’s time spent by yourself that you won’t get back and that alone time that is spent with your inner self is precious.
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