The first time going to a gynecologist can be nerve wracking but that’s normal. Do your research. Ask loved ones for recommendations. Decide if you feel comfortable with a female or male doctor. That is your choice. You must feel comfortable going to the practitioner that you will be visiting on a regular basis. It’s important to have that trust and be comfortable with someone you will be exposing yourself to. Let them know if you prefer small talk or not if you find that one or the other is more calming during your visits. Establish a healthy relationship with your practitioner from the get go so that everyone is on one accord and the anxiety of visiting the gynecologist dwindles.
Body positivity and sex positivity are topics that are severely under-addressed when it comes to feminism. So much of the discussion is wrapped around equality and equity regarding the opposite sex in the workplace and in politics that so often, everything else that entails what it means to be a women gets forgotten. So often, the discussion about all of the incredible people that make up who we are as a collective of women, which is so diverse, gets lost. It’s time to celebrate what makes us women. We are not a monolith. Sex can be messy but it’s not a dirty thing to talk about. We all do it. So why not learn how to do it well, how to find out what works best for us, and how to best be safe while we explore our sexual identity?
The death of George Floyd has made the world all aware of what is going on and forced those who have turned a blind eye to the issue to choose to be on the right side of history or not. Some people whose eyes are being opened and want to work to change this country for the better may not know what to say or what to do now. We are not obligated to do the work for them but I encourage you to encourage those coming to you to continue to seek out the knowledge and resources that they need to educate themselves and support Black lives.
When I was younger, I always knew that I wanted children, regardless of if a man thought that I was fit to be his wife or partner. I knew that I didn’t want to leave this world without reproducing. As a little girl, yes, I wanted to get married and have the fairytale wedding that society sells us but I also knew that having children was very important to me. Whether you’re single or not, bringing life into this world and/or shaping and molding a life from childhood into adulthood is nothing short of miraculous.
The most important thing to remember when finding out what books work for you is being okay with the fact that you will not click with every book and that is perfectly okay. If you do not finish a book, there is no reason to feel guilty about it. Reading is subjective so even if you know that a book is technically good, it may not be right for you. It’s fun to get caught up in the latest Oprah Book Club pick, Shondaland recommendation, latest book to movie adaptation, and hot book of the moment but don’t put pressure on yourself to finish or like a book that is simply not working for you. You’re not in school anymore, no one is forcing you to read something that does not bring you joy.