Why do we hurt the person we care about so much? Why not leave instead of hurting your partner? In this episode, Sherley and Kira discuss what often provokes infidelity, detaching, accountability, putting energy towards positive things, and choosing the right path. We help you understand the “why” behind cheating, how to avoid being the person who cheats, cheating styles, and working through being the person who has been cheated on. We walk through setting the tone for what we want, listening to our gut, and the importance of communication.
It’s so important to understand the differences between a compromise, a sacrifice, and completely losing yourself in someone else or making it easier to not have to do any of these things. Because making it easier to not have to put in the work is a factor in becoming the side chick. Relationships take work, whether monogamous or polyamorous. You are hurting yourself, the person who has accepted you as their side chick, the person that they are cheating on, and anyone else who is touched by the main relationship when you decide to stunt your growth and theirs. By refusing to do the work by yourself, you are cutting off the opportunity to grow with someone else.