It’s so important to understand the differences between a compromise, a sacrifice, and completely losing yourself in someone else or making it easier to not have to do any of these things. Because making it easier to not have to put in the work is a factor in becoming the side chick. Relationships take work, whether monogamous or polyamorous. You are hurting yourself, the person who has accepted you as their side chick, the person that they are cheating on, and anyone else who is touched by the main relationship when you decide to stunt your growth and theirs. By refusing to do the work by yourself, you are cutting off the opportunity to grow with someone else.
Miscommunication is a big factor in infidelity. Being absentminded and/or physically absent for periods of time can also be a major factor. There are many factors. It all comes down to not being appreciated and loved in a way that we should be. It comes down to not respecting the space between the people in the relationship and all that encompasses that space. When that space is threatened, even by you yourself, it’s still yours. It’s still a comfort so it may not be something that you’re willing to leave.
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